Today I went to a new class with the girls. I really enjoyed it but there was something niggling in the back of my mind whilst I was there.
You see, my girls are 9 months old now. Yet there were babies there who were 7 months old who were already crawling! There was a ten month old baby who was close to walking. She was saying “hiya” and waving and clapping! My girls do neither yet and I started to worry.
Are my girls behind?
Is there something wrong with them?
Are they getting less attention because they’re twins? Is that why they haven’t developed as much?
Should I be doing more?
Are all these mums sitting here judging me?
Is it because they’re breastfed?
Is it because we’re doing baby led weaning?
All these thoughts were swimming around in my head and as I came I was tempted to Google “is my baby normal”.
I think my biggest surprise in becoming a parent is how often you feel judged. Or how often you feel worried that people are judging you or your parenting skills. Every inch of your child’s life feels like a direct reflection on you.
And so today at this group I was worrying and comparing. Then I shook myself out of it because as the quote goes “comparison is the thief of joy”. My girls bring me so much joy, joy beyond measure! In three months time they’ll be one, meaning I have three months left of them being babies. Real babies. So I intend to soak up every minute of it. I’ll cherish the days before they start crawling because I know it’ll be unbelievably difficult running after both of them. I’ll eagerly wait for them to wave and clap but the wait will just make it more special when it comes. They are babies for such a short time and I won’t tie myself up in knots comparing them. At the end of the day we are all different and that goes for babies too!